If you had asked me if I thought Jennifer Coolidge would have been the connective tissue between each season of The White Lotus a week ago, I’d have said, “duh.”
But that all came crashing down on The White Lotus Season 2 Episode 7, a shocking season finale that shattered expectations and sent the survivors on different paths.
Yes, we’re starting with Tanya because that was shocking. I wanted to believe Tanya would figure out the plot sooner rather than later.
Unfortunately, she knew her fate was sealed the moment she got on the yacht because there was nowhere she could run.
Quentin’s plan wasn’t as well-orchestrated as he would like everyone to believe.
Viewers were calling the fact that he was up to no good, and it was almost like Tanya’s mind was making her question everything throughout this finale.
Had she figured out the plot before she got on the boat, she could have tipped off the police and probably escaped with her life.
Watching her in danger on the yacht as she unraveled the plot to kill her and for Greg to benefit from the prenup that would leave everything to him was deeply unsettling.
It’s hard to imagine what was going through Tanya’s mind when she found the tape, the rope, and the gun.
For the first time this season, Quentin’s demeanor was changing. This whole thing had become such a chore by the end for him that he wanted Tanya dead and to get his cut of the will.
The revelation about the prenup also confirmed that Greg had been playing Tanya since their first meeting in Hawai’i.
Despite the photographic proof on The White Lotus Season 2 Episode 6, I couldn’t rule out Quentin and Greg working separately to outmaneuver the other to get the money.
I know I’m grasping at straws here, but I’m still trying to process the scenes on the yacht. The story took a dark turn, and I can’t believe Tanya was the person floating in the ocean at the beginning of The White Lotus Season 2 Episode 1.
Tanya had her flaws, but I don’t think she was a bad person. Had she been more present and self-aware, she’d still be alive.
I expected her to either be pushed or fall off the boat when she climbed up. There was no telling whether someone else would have shown up to make that day even more torture for her.
Tragically, she died trying to save her life, but at least she went out knowing she killed some of the people who would have benefited from her demise.
Tanya spiraled out of control on the yacht. There’s no playbook on how to react when people know they’re about to be killed, but Greg and Quentin knew they could outmaneuver Tanya if they got her alone.
Ever since her arrival in Hawaii on The White Lotus Season 1, we’ve watched Tanya crave attention, and the slightest glimpse of it makes her believe everything people are saying.
We knew she had some deeply rooted emotional issues that stayed with her from the past, but I wanted her to get on that boat and get back to the shore.
After one of Quentin’s men escaped into the water, I figured he was the person Daphne must have found the following day, so you can only imagine the look on my face when Tanya accidentally killed herself moments later.
It’s hard not to feel short-changed that we didn’t get another appearance from Jon Gries. Maybe he’ll return on The White Lotus Season 3 because the show likes to bring a group of terrible people together.
Another big surprise was Jack. Given that the first season ended with the death of someone who was not rich, I expected more of the same here.
Jack has zero redeeming qualities. He was a walking red flag, but I’m thankful he took Portia to the airport. He’s been so unpredictable that I didn’t see any way out for Portia.
The big question will be what Jack does next, now that Portia made the phone call changed the trajectory of what happened on the yacht and, of course, his “uncle’s” fate.
It’s hard to tell what was going through Jack’s mind when Portia unloaded that she knew something was going on and that he had sex with the man introduced to her as his uncle.
But Jack could also see that Portia deeply cared for Tanya, which may have been the catalyst in letting her live. Portia was never meant to be on vacation, so Quentin and Greg had to get creative at the last minute.
The most awkward part of Portia’s journey is how she ends up in the airport without any luggage and asking Albie for his number.
Was that her way of apologizing, or was it her way of tipping the hat to the audience that she’s over unpredictable men?
There was a genuine connection between Portia and Albie earlier on The White Lotus Season 2, but she quickly got bored with him after making eye contact with Jack.
Might we see Portia and Albie on vacation in a future season because it seems like there’s a good chance it might happen now, which is surprising.
Albie forcing his dad’s hand to transfer the money to the account for Lucia was another shocker, but Albie knew how to manipulate his dad emotionally.
Dominic has been desperately trying to change his image, and his son going home and treating the vacation as a positive experience for Abby will help him win his wife back.
I’m not surprised all three Di Grasso men made it back to the U.S., but there were definitely some concerns about their relationships when they returned home.
Lucia swindling Albie all along wasn’t surprising, either, but I reckon Albie will look at this as a learning experience. Then again, he did give Portia his number.
Lucia played the long game and got results. Alessio being a part of the con all along and working for the hotel was a surprise.
With Lucia arriving at the boat in the premiere, waiting for someone to recognize her, we should have known how this would end.
A part of me did think Lucia or Mia would die at the end of the season, and the master suite key and Giuseppe’s return both did a great job of keeping me in suspense.
Valentina didn’t have nearly as much impact on the finale as I expected. She was barely a part of the finale, save for her giving Mia the job full-time.
I think Valentina falls very fast for potential lovers and was probably already thinking about a future with Mia. I expected Valentina to throw Mia out of the hotel when her new full-time pianist said she and Lucia could help her find a girlfriend.
It’s hard to imagine Valentina hanging out with them both after what happened at the hotel, but Valentina is one of the few characters the show should revisit.
The season barely scratched the surface of her story, but maybe it’s best that I’m left wanting more.
Harper admitting that something happened with Cameron was another shocker, but Ethan was scary as he tried to get the truth out of his wife.
This relationship had a clear double standard, and Harper struggled to comprehend her husband’s actions.
He was happy enough to brush everything she said under the rug and chalk them up to character flaws, but it was different when the shoe was on the other foot.
I can’t be the only one who wanted another beatdown between Cameron and Ethan during the final dinner, but if this last episode taught us anything, the fighting between the couples probably helped them both.
Harper and Ethan were headed for divorce, but Cameron’s meddling saved them.
Who would have thought that was possible?
Despite being mainly on the periphery, Daphne was a big part of this entire story because her commentary was everything.
Overall, “Arrivederci” wasn’t as satisfying as expected, but it was still an excellent hour of television.
I can’t wait to discover where Mike White and HBO will take us next.
What did you think of Tanya’s demise? Did you expect it?
Hit the comments.
Stream the first two seasons of The White Lotus on HBO and HBO Max.
Paul Dailly is the Associate Editor for TV Fanatic. Follow him on Twitter.