Ina Garten’s memoir, Be Ready When The Luck Happens, completely transformed my life. Ina’s take on life, sprinkled with fabulous dinner parties, good friends, and delicious food, inspired my 2025 New Year’s resolution to host my loved ones once a month. I had never hosted a dinner party before January, but was determined to consistently invite my friends over for catch-ups, celebrations, and deep convos over cocktails and cheese boards. Any excuse to get off my phone and create true connection was the goal. As we finish out the year, I’m so proud to say that I’ve kept my promise to myself. I’ve hosted about a dozen cozy gatherings since January! Prioritizing my community offline has been a joy, and I now have quite the collection of dinner party hosting lessons to take with me as we enter the holiday season.
Hosting season is often associated with Thanksgiving feasts and Christmas dinners, which, let’s be real, can add extra pressure and anxiety. With all of my 2025 gatherings under my belt, I’m happy to share that hosting once a month has shifted my perspective on holiday hosting. Ahead, here are a few dinner party hosting lessons I’m taking with me into the final months of the year.
Hosting Is a Practice
As someone with perfectionist tendencies, I initially held myself back from hosting. I thought that my house wasn’t big enough, that I wasn’t a good enough cook, and that my friends weren’t really interested in coming over anyway. Talk about hosting anxiety! All three of these things were untrue, but this mindset can hold you back from trying anything new, including hosting. Gathering is a practice.
The first time I invited friends over for dinner, I was a bundle of nerves. I wanted everything to go smoothly, but I had to remind myself that this was my first time. Of course, I was a little nervous! Over time, the nerves dissipated and turned to excitement. I just needed a few dinner parties under my belt to relax into it.
The act of gathering regularly has improved my confidence, eased my perfectionism, and deepened my sense of community. Whether you’re hosting Thanksgiving for the first time, or the hundredth time, remember to meet yourself where you are.
Your Guests Are Everything
It’s not about what’s on the table, it’s about who’s around it. Social media can make it seem like hosting is all about how beautiful your tablescape is, how stunning the dishes are, or how fancy the cocktails can be. I will be the first to admit that I love the aesthetic parts of hosting—setting the table is my favorite. But I always do my best to make the most important thing the most important thing—the guests. Hosting is about gathering and connecting with your loved ones. Make the gathering about keeping you and your friends comfortable, happy, and well fed.
I love having a welcome drink ready to go as soon as guests walk through the door. Have appetizers set on the table before guests arrive and clear cues for where to set their coats and shoes. Your mood as the host sets the tone, so be sure you take a moment to relax before guests arrive. Sharing space (and a meal!) creates connections that social media can’t replicate. Be sure to revel in your loved ones company.
Start Small
Dinner parties don’t have to be huge affairs. Keeping things small creates more intimacy which may even be preferred, especially if you’re an introvert. The holiday hosting season can feel like bigger is better—there is so much to do, see, and plan! But if you’re a beginner host, or perhaps you’re just ready to slow down a bit, it’s more than okay to start small. All of my gatherings this year have been with four to six people at a time, and it’s been perfect. But if large gatherings are what you prefer, give yourself permission to work up to it.
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
Co-hosting has been an incredible gift to me this year. Setting out solo was a little bit intimidating, especially in the beginning of my hosting adventures. But planning a party with a friend takes some of the pressure off. Plus, it can be more fun! If you have an idea for a dinner party, but don’t want to plan it by yourself, consider asking a friend to co-host with you. That way, you’ll have someone to bounce ideas off of, plus you can split the costs and work load. The same goes for holiday hosting! Co-hosting a Friendsgiving or holiday gathering sounds so fun.
Use What You Have
Building my arsenal of hosting supplies this year has been so enjoyable—my platters and utensils are a mix of estate sale finds, family heirlooms and brand new items. While it’s tempting to go full out with themed dinners and decor—having a core collection of supplies is key. I live in a townhome with minimal storage space, so keeping things simple has been both cost effective and stress reducing. If you have the budget and the space for themed supplies (and it brings you joy!) then by all means, go for it! But I’ve found using what I have has made my gatherings simple, easy to throw together and cozy all the same.
All in all, hosting truly has no season—gathering with loved ones offline and in person can (and should!) happen year-round. Whether you’re inviting a few friends over for coffee, or you’re ready to plan a 5 course meal, consider this your sign to gather with your friends and family!